Since then, as was the case in my putting off continuing my posts, (sorry), I sort of put my search on hold for a bit. Things got ever more crazy at work, and we parted ways.
I was in a period of transition, and figuring out who else I was when I also had to figure out paying my rent just did not feel like the right investment of time at the moment.
As I’m looking back through my email and various accounts, I see that I DID decide to get another DNA test done shortly after my parents’ visit, this time through 23andme. Everything I had (very briefly) read up on at the time suggested that I try to get tested with the “Big 3” (AncestryDNA, FTDNA, and 23andMe) in order to increase the chances of my finding the match that would be my key to me. Since I had already covered FTDNA through their agreement to share data with AncestryDNA, the only one left to do was 23andMe. Given how long it took to get my AncestryDNA results back, and my strong desire to know what the hell was going on, I ordered the kit in a rush, received it at the end of October, then rushed it straight back to the company.
In the meantime, I secured a temporary position through the end of the school year working at a friend’s school and packed for my next trip home–Thanksgiving, which was just around the corner. So many thoughts and questions were swirling through my head, foremost amongst them what and how I would tell and ask my family. Ultimately, I was hoping that I would magically just “find a good time” over the course of the week that I would be home to pull one or both of my parents aside, and hope to God that I could bring it up in a way that didn’t cause defensiveness or backfire on my ability to learn more.
On November 20th, I boarded a plane for Philadelphia. My parents informed me that they would be away the weekend I flew in, but they’d be back in a few days, so my brother (who would be in the area) would need to pick me up.
James (name changed for the time being, for privacy) picked me up once my flight landed, and we drove back to my parents’ house. At that point in time, I hadn’t shared what I had found out just yet, and was still struggling to decide if that was even the right thing to do, but was leaning toward the idea that it indeed was…especially since it was something he had inquired about earlier, so it seemed pretty clear that it was in fact something he wanted to know…and might even feel somewhat validated by finding out…but still, I had to figure out the right time and way to convey what I had learned.